Alcohol

Funny thing is, right now I can not even count how much I have had to drink. I make it a habit to pour the wine at the half way mark so that I never count empty glasses. Bottles disappear as soon as they are emptied so that I never have to count them either. I like wine.

Twelve years ago, my drink of choice was Bacardi 151 and Coke... Tall with a 4 shots of 151 and the rest Coke. As I would sit there chatting with whomever I was at Hapas with and of course Nicole when she came by that is what I would be sipping on. Cherry Coke and 151... well that is what I would have liked to be sipping on. On nights when I would sit at the bar and talk with Ray, that is exactly what I would get. With Nicole though... Different story.

She did not like guys who drank. The drinks would get weaker as the night went on, and by the third or fourth drink the 151 had been replaced with extra cherries and syrup. She kept me from completely destroying my body at 21. Secretly I appreciated that. I could sit and "drink" for hours, listen to good music and keep good company and not get drunk. It also allowed me to consciously and coherently flirt with her. I think she secretly enjoyed that. 

I know I can never go back and rewrite this chapter in my life, but I would love to know what happened to her. Did her life ever turn around, and is she happy? Does she have children and is she happy? Did I mention I like wine... I never count the bottles... or glasses.... looses all fun that way.

Can you miss someone you did not love?